Why I Bailed on Almost Every Original Netflix Series Except Daredevil

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I came to the disturbing realisation the other day that I’ve only ever completed or continued to keep up to date with ONE Netflix original TV series. Every other single original Netflix show – I’ve either lost interested in or haven’t bothered to watch… yet.

Make no mistake, as several of my colleagues and even my wife (who yelled at me for this being my own fault and it is…) have pointed out – I’m the guilty party here. The first step of recovery is admitting you’re wrong. So that’s what I’m going to do. Part of me thinks that the problem I have is that Netflix is too much too quickly. I have this same issue when I get too many comics all at once. Because I have so many sitting in front of me – it’s overwhelming and I can end up letting the stack sit there forever until I slowly move through it. So before I get to my Netflix confession — Before I rattle off the list of Netflix original TV shows that I bailed on – here are the exceptions:

Not counting: The movies, show continuations (eg. Arrested Development S4), or the kids’ animated series although I will say Turbo: FAST is easily the best of the bunch – fantastic cultural references and funnier than the film.

Shows I’m still watching and WANT to continue watching: Master of None and F is for Family (Note: Jessica Jones MIGHT be included in this list…. MIGHT be eventually….)

Haven’t started yet: House of Cards, Making a Murderer, Grace and Frankie, W/ Bob & David or Real Rob.

Daredevil


Marvel's Daredevil

When I bailed: I didn’t!

Does it suck or am I wrong? – This show is the best Netflix Original Series.

I love Daredevil. I am extremely excited for season two, which will introduce Jon Bernthal as one of my favorite Marvel heroes – The Punisher when it debuts March 18th. This was my first and only Netflix “Binge” experience. I ordered pizza and I watched around half of the first season in one weekend – completing the rest throughout the next week when I had time. That’s about as “Binge” as I can get these days when I have to work, run a website and you know – be a father/husband/human being. Daredevil was action-packed, violent, gripping and easily the finest Marvel Studios project yet (including their film library…)

Between


between

When I bailed: S1 E3 (ish)

Does it suck or am I wrong? – The show sucks.

An event series where everyone over the age of 20-something just up and dies horribly. The premise was great, the first episode extremely promising. I decided to get the hell out when a dude was testing out a minefield by throwing his backpack of supplies into the danger zone and then watching all of his money and essential items explode before his very glazed over stupid-ass eyes. The characters drove me nuts – that image above makes me physically angry. I rarely question plot motives but Between was the dumbest thing I watched on Netflix in 2015.

Bloodline


bloodline

When I bailed: S1 E5 (ish)

Does it suck or am I wrong? – I’m wrong.

Ben Mendelsohn is such a damn good actor. The reason why I bailed on Bloodline was because there were too many other enticing TV distracting at the time of it’s release. That and I had issues with the bizarre flashforwards and didn’t feel like getting dicked around until the VERY final episode to see what happened on that boat. I’m hoping that I was wrong about that being the case and I intend to go back one day… Maybe… I’m not entirely sure it’s worth my time right now even with Mendelsohn’s awesome performance as the black sheep who returns home and throws his rich family’s life into chaos.

Bojack Horseman


bojack

When I bailed: S1 E1

Does it suck or am I wrong? – The show sucks.

I like Will Arnett. I like Aaron Paul. I like stupid animated comedies made for adults. So why don’t I love Bojack Horseman? The first episode didn’t make me laugh. Not once. And that – is a problem. Sorry.

Hemlock Grove


Hemlock1

When I bailed: S1 E7

Does it suck or am I wrong? – The show sucks.

Hemlock Grove has one of the greatest werewolf transformations – ever. It also has some of the worst acting performances – ever. I could not get past the dull, lackluster performances in this strange horror series and I tried so very hard to do so. I loved the concept, the cast seemed fine on paper, but this disjointed mess of a show never hooked me into thinking it would turn into something decent. Not once.

Jessica Jones


jessica

When I bailed: S1 E5

Does it suck or am I wrong? – I’m being told I’m wrong. Constantly.

I tried so very hard with Jessica Jones but I’m not getting it. I’m sure the show gets better eventually – it has to right? Everyone I talk to – including the FFFN staff say I’m dead wrong about this but I have to be honest. I’m having a hard time justifying why we need to see Jessica Jones and Luke Cage rail each other non-stop. It’s the most gratuitious and meaningless – chemistry-free sex scenes that I’ve seen in years. It all came across like Marvel was just trying out some edgy shit because they could now. It’s Netflix! Look at our heroes sexing each other and drinking booze and shit! Yeah – EXTREME! I’m going to give it another shot one day. But I don’t really want to – it’s just out of guilt and the persistence of my colleagues.

Lilyhammer


lilyhammer-s1-stills-hr-4

When I bailed: S1 E4

Does it suck or am I wrong? – I’m wrong.

A mish mash of The Sopranos and Napolean Dynamite? Why did I stop watching Lilyhammer? What I saw, was fantastic. It was funny, bizarre and captivating. Steven Van Zandt is terrific in this but I still believe that because he looks so strange – that I always have difficulty hitting resume on my Netflix list. It’s not his fault – I’m shallow. Why do I even care what he looks like? I don’t know – it’s just odd, it’s all weird and silly and I gave up. I’ll return one day – probably when the show is completely over.

Marco Polo


Lorenzo Richelmy in a scene from Netflix's "Marco Polo." Photo Credit: Phil Bray for Netflix.

When I bailed: S1 E2

Does it suck or am I wrong? – It probably sucks – but in a good way.

Marco Polo got a lot of shit when it hit Netflix. There were a lot of complaints that this was the company’s weak attempt at bringing out their own Game of Thrones scale hit – even the theme song drew criticism of sounding too much like Thrones. My dad called me the other day though to tell me that he finished Marco Polo and that I should consider checking it out because there’s this badass warrior on there called Hundred Eyes who kicks all kinds of ass. He sorta convinced me into giving it another shot. I’m a sucker for good action.

Narcos


narcos

When I bailed: S1 E6

Does it suck or am I wrong? – I’m wrong.

Narcos was awesome. The reason why I gave up when I did, was because I wound up entrenched in the Fall season of television and all kinds of great shit returned to distract me. The disjointed narrative of Narcos, the bouncing back and forth between English and Spanish dialog, intercut with actual historical footage – it can come off as messy and confusing. Plus you know – I can’t like play on my phone during the slow parts because then I’m not reading important drug deal plans in subtitle format. So I gave up. My bad.

Orange is The New Black


orange

When I bailed: S3 E2

Does it suck or am I wrong? – The show has started to suck in a pretentious way.

If you look at it this way – Orange is The New Black is the longest amount of time I’ve spent watching a Netflix original series. Over two seasons in the can but these characters were really starting to get on my nerves and annoy me. The opening episodes to season three didn’t interest me at all and I didn’t sense any sort of urgency to advance Piper’s main storyline so I didn’t feel the need to continue watching either. The show isn’t bad – it’s just not as captivating as it once was and there was no hook into that next episode.

Sense8


sense8

When I bailed: S1 E10

Does it suck or am I wrong? – The show kinda sucks.

I’m almost there – I’m right at the freaking end but I just don’t…. give a shit. Sense8 is as fascinating as it is annoying and my god can it get annoying. I love weird shows – I loved The Leftovers and it was weird as hell. Sense8 started to come across as being weird for the sake of being weird. Having all these characters tied to one another is a great concept, but I didn’t find myself interested in the majority of them and because of this – I started to become disinterested in the entire show as a result. I plan on finishing this before season two fires up though – and there better be some damn answers…

Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt


kimmysch

When I bailed: S1 E7 (ish)

Does it suck or am I wrong? – I’m told I’m wrong but I still think it sucks.

Ok. Kimmy Schmidt is a tough one. I laughed, I didn’t care, then I laughed some more, then I felt obligated to laugh at times and eventually I just stopped giving a shit. My wife is angry at me for not continuing this show and she’s probably right. Scott (FFFN Crew) says I’m missing out and he’s probably correct as well. I might be the only person on the planet who isn’t finding Tituss Burgess to be amusing. When I laugh – it’s usually in reference to the plot devices of Kimmy experiencing the world for the first time as a woman-child and that can only go so far before it becomes too gimmicky.

Wet Hot American Summer: First Day of Camp


wethot

When I bailed: S1 E4

Does it suck or am I wrong? – I’m wrong

Paul Rudd is too good. In prep for this prequel mini-series I watched the Wet Hot American Summer movie for the first time. I only laughed at the Rudd sequences and the part when the camp counsellors goes into town and do all the horrible drugs. It was hilarious but ultimately very stupid. I don’t know why they assembled such an incredible cast for such a useless idea but I’m happy that they did. The only reason I stopped watching is because this show was SO stupid, even for me, that I just didn’t feel pressed into continuing it. I will though – you bet your ass I will and probably when I’m drunk and bored.

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Editor-In-Chief of Fox Force Five News. I had a zombie cameo on the opening page of The Walking Dead issue #91, where I was killed with a machete... It was awesome.
  • Ace King

    Just wanna say I agree with everything you said about all these shows on Netflix. Right now, Netflix’s flagship shows are House of Cards and Daredevil. So if you haven’t gotten around to HOC then you are definitely missing out, but then again as good and dark the storytelling of Daredevil is, I’m not into the whole superhero bullshit at my age so I don’t know how HOC will play out for you. It’s a slow burn (not as slow as Bloodline) like Daredevil but without the action, it’s a political genre remade from the original UK version.

    Rest is extremely pretentious bullshit that is specifically created for niche viewers. Take for example Bojack Horseman, extremely stupid show about narcissism and vanity, like a video project between all the Hollywood besties bitching about their first world problems. I have nothing against the voice actors, but this show just doesn’t make me laugh. Like you said, I honestly forced my self to laugh for the sake of laughing to let people around me know that I got the “joke”. I honestly don’t understand what the fuck is up with all the positive reviews for Bojack. And I feel glad you only wasted 30 min on the first episode instead of bailing out mid season.

    Finally I found someone who dislikes this show. I had to literally search “Bojack Sucks” on google and found this fucking article which was, by the way, the only article that shat on Bojack Horseman. I thought I was the fucking crazy one.

  • Cassandra Atticum

    The best thing about Jessica Jones was David Tennant and he doesn’t really show up until episode 7. Eight and nine were my favorite episodes in the series. I didn’t care for Ten and then there were scenes in twelve that I liked. I could have used fewer sex scenes, but those did end midway…

    I stuck with Bloodline because of Mendelsohn. I was losing interest and then they caught my attention again at the very end… but now I can’t remember why.

    I wanted to like Sense8 and I would have if they’d had more of the scenes where they took over each other’s bodies to get out of tough situations. But there were too many really weird things for me like that bizarre birthing sequence.

    I think I got one episode into Hemlock Grove series two and abandoned it.

    I am still watching OITNB, but the last episode didn’t really impress me.

    I liked Kimmy Schmidt while I had it on, but could take or leave season 2.

    I haven’t bothered with any of the others.

    I do like House of Cards, but then I love Kevin Spacey. The last season tested my patience, though.

    I liked Frankie and Grace. Lily Tomlin was a delight.

    As a criminal defense lawyer, Making a Murderer drove me nuts… but it was good.